The call came in on Monday. My only sister living in Mexico was hospitalized for complications with diabetes. Diabetes, along with ICE, has been on the top five threats to my family's physical and emotional well being. At this point, it appears that my sister's condition has aggravated her kidneys, requiring dialysis and constant medical care.
There's not much I can do for my sister all the way from Chicago. I have been speaking to my nephew, her son. He has been gracious and extremely attentive to her needs, leaving work and being by her side for the past few days. That's what family is supposed to do and that's precisely what's been bothering me the most.
It's in moments like this that I feel powerless and overwhelmed with despair and frustration. Thoughts rush through my mind about the potential lethality of my sister's condition. I fear for what could potentially happen and the fact that I can't simply pick up and be by her side. I try to be strong for my mother, and my siblings. I do what I always have done and learned to do in this state of limbo. I rationalize the situation and think about it's within my power to do.
It's been over 20 years now that I've been here. Legal status limbo is not the place I want to be anymore. I can't bear the thought of losing another love one and not being able to see them at least one more time. I have already lost many relatives and friends and it has troubled me that I wasn't able to give them a last farewell. I know we won't see each other again. And it's also moments like this that kills me being an atheist and not believing that we are nothing but dust dispersed randomly through the universe.
What would I give to be by my sister's side right now.
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